hobby

FUN

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As Samuel’s healing progresses, so too my mood with less anxiety, enough so that Shane brought the kids over for lasagna yesterday at lunchtime during his break from work at his home office.

My granddaughter spent the rest of day and overnight and is still nestled in the little bedroom painted pale pink for just such an occasion adorned with sticky backed mirrored hearts on the walls.

She spent hours making paper flowers prepared beforehand for her, a bouquet of hyacinths for her own room, and one for her mom.  

Today she will finish with a bouquet of peonies.

FEAR

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this week’s morning surprise…

Almost two weeks go by with sleep, then bam, laying there till Samuel comes to bed three hours later realizing a sleep med was needed. So late night TV for an hour until it takes effect.

But why? No fear or anxiety was noticed, yet niggling deep down on later inspection the next day there lies great fear (s). Fear tamped down because aren’t we all supposed to be on a tra la la trail? All positive with a go forward attitude?

My instincts take me other places especially in the winter. And fear is the sled ridden through the cold snow of what’s to come. After years of pain, Samuel’s hip is now grinding bone on bone. We saw two specialists, both expert at what they do, but one goes in from the front without cutting through muscle and we chose him.

It’s scheduled in a few weeks. He is concerned, and joined to the hip with him in our partnership, so am I.  

To keep worried hands busy…paper peonies made with coffee filters scribbled with pink marker around the edges, wet the filters, then the pink bleeds throughout.

Onto the first of many hyacinths with many more colors to come.

SPRING?

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Sitting on the frond porch late in the day with a sleeveless dress warm in the sun. Is it spring? A gaggle of geese fly by squawking loudly in unison.

Peacefulness fills me up. This luscious break is ever so precious amid the winter depression that dampens my spirit.

But this year a discovery to uplift me, venturing outside in the pre-dawn. That pleasure is usually missed in winter due to dark days which now have turned the corner and each day is longer and brighter- out in the meadow before the birds wake, walking as I do in summertime but without the sun.

Our joys often need founding by ourselves. What brings joy? Scrapbooking is another way to fill my heart with warmth, gathering both sons photos filling books for the grandkids with captions as some are just learning to read.

Bright colored cardstock with fancily trimmed pictures done so easily with scissors that cut them that way, glued onto paper embellished with stickers and other eye-captivating, meaningful additions.

The kids cherish my gifts, one grand-son only 2 having a shelf special for Nana’s books. This pleasures my heart as much as his, and gives the kid in me childish things to do with a grown-up twist satisfying both parts of me.

In winter especially, it is a time to seek out the things I love to do and do them. Quiet past-times, uneventful for some, fill me up contentedly.

COLORS

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Photos by Patricia

Like Dumbledore’s magic wand changing the flag colors in the Great Hall, the meadow flows with the season; first buttercups, green tall grasses with glowing butter yellows, then daisies joining in the dance of gaiety.

And now? The meadow bursts with the lace of Queen Anne.

SUNDAY

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Photos by Patricia- 6AM this morn…

My church,

My pew,

My home.

She opens her flowing robes welcoming me, this morning goddess. The chilly creek being hit by warmth creating her once again. The air so cold the thought of a winter coat, but my thick jacket, hat and scarf will do. July and so cold? Later in the day, a sundress, and a swim.

The magic formed by cool meeting warms enthralls me every time.

JOY

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PHOTOS BY PATRICIA

As health returns so to does emotional, spiritual, and mental well-being. When gloomy thoughts invade, or the past, or the future, be with NOW feeling my body, noticing the surroundings even in the darkness.

Sticking with now, usually having to repeat the mantra as thoughts drift, brings the moment into me… living it instead of wasting it. It is like meditating while moving.

Your choice, be gloomy or joyful, and when healthy the later is so much easier to choose.