And so, the holiday season officially sets in. Snow falls prettily icing the branches like royal frosting, as kitty curls up beside me at the fire. My thoughts jumble negatively much more so than in summer days when light fills me with more feelings of worth and joy.
But joy is to be had if looking and working towards it. When the adult takes the reins to protect the willful, hurt, always hurt child. There is an adult in me that can guide with wisdom, but the child no one saw, protected, or helped is so in need and I must be there for her.
When the cat jumps on my lap don’t dissociate, pet her, feel the purr way down deep inside. So often my erratic brain takes me elsewhere and simple pleasure are not taken in fully. It takes presence.
2 thoughts on “PRESENTS”
Staying present and simply sitting and being is something I’ve chosen to walk in this season.
I do not have any desire for this holiday due in part to some deep grief I’m walking through.
It’s kinda like I’ve dropped the reigns to the horses that seem to be driving me down this unfamiliar path we’ve been trodding in the rough and wild mountain side.
Old habits, old familiar processes, have me wanting to fade away instead of feeling all the pain; yet, I know that the healing is way messy and feeling is very important!
May you be grounded in each moment to receive each blessing provided!
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Our bodies have a way of allowing up pain in increments so that it can be dealt with and not become overwhelming, though it does feel overwhelming sometimes. I know you are grieving many losses… hold on… and thank you. You give even when in pain.