The Blizzard

photo by Patricia

Reproaching constantly when failing to meeting goals, expectations or plans fortifies the harsh force living inside that leaps to the forefront more quickly than the warm, soft one. The latter is newly cultivated and without nurturance wilts quickly needing continual moistening with tender attention.

You know winters are hard. Yet you expect to perform as if it is not. Reminders of its challenges and how difficult they are will soften expectations, heighten your ability to see successes over failures, and make the path more enjoyable.

It is work to repair so many years of engrained self-flogging that started at age eight and only flourished as decades passed. As a child touched in such criminal ways, and silenced to meet others needs of normalcy, it is common to take the crimes on as if they were your own.

Hating oneself solidifies. Self-love, what is that? That is the work, softness, warmness, and acceptance towards oneself. Is there a part of the brain that  never softens from the blizzard of self-reproach?

The windows yesterday were closed when temperatures began to drop from 60. Rain melted the snow filling the creek into a pond. Wind raged through the night. Upon waking it is 16 degrees and snow swirls to over a foot.

Kitten curls up on my lap as the word gratitude wraps around me like snow.   


One thought on “The Blizzard

  1. Winters are hard, yet beautiful. The seasons go round in the life cycle. The day follows night, the spring follows winter. Snuggle with Christy when it gets hard, a beloved pet will always senses safety, security and love , you always have that in you to give. My comforts are small things, my cats, open fire, fleece socks, cappucino, reading a book in bed with the electric blanket on. such things bring me happiness and I am here not there back then….
    Your photo of snow, just an amazing sight.

    Liked by 1 person

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