Chaos. When the president elect seems to enjoy causing chaos I become queasy and scared. Dictatorship. I feel weak, victimized, and dissolve into tears, head bent.

That is how I felt when siblings were attacking me. My Mom did nothing. I told, I fought, then pretended sleep having no choice but to surrender to the horror that was ongoing from age 8-11.

That is how I feel now about the supposed ‘leader’ who is to run our country, as if no one can stop his mouth, his lies, his taking over and doing what he wants, saying what he wants, disrespecting anyone who doesn’t exalt him.

I feel nauseous and unsafe, fearful for us all. Will there be enough checks and balances to protect us from him? There wasn’t when I was eight.


11 thoughts on “CHECKS & BALANCES

  1. I hear you sister. We may not have had anyone aware, vigilant and ready to take action when we were young, but millions are watching the situation now. This is an opportunity for people to rise up as needed. In the meantime, be good to yourself please. I hope you have a peaceful day and maybe a good walk or fun with a project.

    Liked by 1 person

  2. You know what. I think you have tapped into something here that no one else had been able to put their finger on. YOU just made me realize where the fear comes from. Amazing. Brilliant. When no one listened when I was little, no one listened or did anything when you were little, and then we have this foreboding thought of a leader possibly having those same characteristics. It is downright nauseating. But I didnt realize until you wrote about it. Thank you.
    I’m so sorry those things happened to you!

    Liked by 1 person

  3. I hear you. It is really scary. After the election, Bea told me that almost every trauma client she sees felt the same as I do. So you are far from alone. I keep trying to remind myself that I’m not alone, that millions are watching, that there are checks and balances. We aren’t alone now.

    Liked by 1 person

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