Telling and not being believed or told to be quiet about it and not being protected…if only.
If only I was taken into my mothers arms, held warm and close, and loved, and heard her cry, and heard her chest shake with anger towards her sons, and heard her promise it will never happen again, and me knowing by her reaction that she would keep them away and that she really did love me… if only.
Kids are resilient. If only she had done those things, I would not have been broken. I would have been ok. I don’t think it’s the original acts that broke me, it was after, keeping it all in.
Now I learn to wrap my arms around me and love me.