I feel torn. The eldest son of my mother lost his wife to cancer. The service is today with a gathering at his house after. I am not going. Why? I have no relationship with either of them and am not close with the others. But I do feel sad for him. I don’t wish losing a partner on anyone though there was a time I wanted to cut him up into little pieces.
I feel sad for him, and for the mess of a so called family I was born unto. I can’t be a part of it yet still grieve the loss of a family.